That Burning Question: What's For Dinner?

A friend of mine was recently lamenting the fact that come dinnertime, she's unable to get a meal on the table that everyone wants to eat. Boy, can I relate.

So many studies have been done on the value of families eating dinner together. But between crazy schedules and picky eaters, pulling the family together for a sit-down meal can seem like an antiquated concept right out of the 1950s.

It's enough to make a mom want to tear her hair out.

But when I see a video like this, I realize how important it is that we never stop trying to model healthy habits for our kids.

The thing is, we have to give ourselves permission to re-define healthy habits from time to time. When things are hectic, it's OK to gather the family for a nice bowl of whole-grain cereal with sliced fruit. It still counts.

In our house, we do try to come together as a family for dinner, even if the hour is later than I'd like sometimes. But that time together is a great way to re-connect, polish our table manners and share a laugh or a kind word about the day's events.

As for the food itself, I try really hard to serve well-rounded choices. I know everybody won't always want to eat everything I make and I try hard to let go of any resentment about that. At every meal, I try to include at least one thing that everybody likes. We've also established the "have to try it" rule. If I make something new, you have to give it a try. You can take one bite and say, "I hate this" and get yourself some cereal. But that one bite has to happen and often, the kids will discover that they actually like a new food.

Sure, dinner requires some pre-planning. That may seem stressful, but I've actually found that thinking about "what's for dinner" in advance lessens my stress level. I shop better, spend less money and generally make healthier choices, too.

There are, of course, those nights when everything falls apart. On those days, I roll with the punches and pull out the cereal. After all, being flexible and resilient in the face of adversity -- even if that adversity is simply trying to get dinner on the table -- is a healthy example, too.

How about you? I'd love to hear your healthy dinner strategies for busy nights and picky eaters.

Comments

[karin]

I think we have about the same rules as my parents had when we were growing up: We eat dinner together at the dining table, I cook every day (or my husband does), the children don't have to eat their whole plate, but do have to taste everything and I don't make different things for different people. So if you don't like it, then don't eat. Simple.

Our children eat almost everything. They love to help cooking and fruit and vegetables are eaten with enthusiasm. Somehow, they all don't like mushrooms, even though my husband and I love them. Oh well, they are allowed to not eat the mushrooms. But I am not going to fix them something else when they refuse to eat what I made, which almost never happens by the way.

I think this is a very common way of dealing with dinner here in Holland. I have to say it's shocking to me to see those video tapes that you linked to. The thought of children thinking french fries are vegetables, to give little ones pizza for breakfast, to have a class full of children not knowing the difference between a potatoe and an onion.... Shocking. I'm stunned. I really am.

Maybe I have been lucky with children who eat almost everything. But I think this is mostly because they grew up seeing how we cook every day. They see us enjoy the process, the process of gardening, of picking healthy food in a supermarket, of deciding what to eat and then tasting every bite.

Ofcourse, sometimes things can get hectic. Sometimes it can be fun to eat pancakes for dinner. But to be honest: I don't consider a limited amount of time an excuse to not eat healthy. If you try and learn a couple of simple recipes, then you can have a healthy, tasteful dinner on table in the same time that you can throw something prefab in the microwave and heat it.

As you can tell: I'm very passionate about this. I don't care about what size my children have and how that compares to the standard in society. I do care about their health. And I do care about the habits that they develop right now, while living in our house and eating our food. That's the foundation for their future. What can be more important than that?

[Dara Chadwick]

Thanks, Karin, for your thoughtful response to my post. You make excellent points! I'm curious: Do public schools in Holland have any sort of healthy eating regulations? School lunch programs are a huge issue here in the U.S. right now.

[karin]

Hi Dara. Traditional, children here mostly eat breakfast and dinner at home and eat their lunch either at home or they bring sandwiches to school. Some school are starting to serve lunch, but fries and pizza's are still considered fastfood (and thus unhealthy) here, so you won't see that, or at least I haven't seen it in my area.

But I know bad eating habits of children are starting to become a problem in certain areas here too. And the school system develops and changes every few years. So I have to admit sometimes I worry about what is coming and how we best tackle this growing problem.

[cooper]

I would love to offer a supportive anecdote, but dinner at my house was a place of physical entrapment due to the configuration of the table in the room, and the time most often for Dad to rage and carry on. Needless to say communication in my house was some where between dysfunctional and insane. To this day, dinner is not a comfortable experience for me, even though it was something my family (wife and kids) always did...thankfully my wife recognized it as an important event.